have you ever...

recognized a part of your personality and could pinpoint the exact moment when you became that way?

i'm sure you have. there are so many moments like this, but today i was thinking about my weirdness about touching people. i know for a fact that it all started with those fucking retards up north who, in grade four, when i touched one of them in a friendly way on their back, started yelling about how i was a lesbian. they proceeded to tell everyone, giving them all another reason to exclude me and make me feel stupid and unwanted.

it still amazes me, sometimes, how the smallest seemingly insignificant events can still effect you 15 years later. some hurdles are just still too high, i guess.