joke of the day.
why would anyone wear transparent vinyl shoes? they weren't just made in a sweatshop, they are a sweatshop.
she's a real sidler.
couchy.
so the couch is in and it's comfy. nice looking, too. i want to decorate the rest of the living room in a modern way-- sort of a gotham city type theme but without the spandex.
it arrived around 3:50PM yesterday and i promptly removed plastic and what seemed to be staples (to hold it on) that were applied by seizure john, the ol' staple gun slinger from the southwest (wing). fuck there were a lot.
so i pretty much sat around all day waiting, washed some dishes, really enjoyed the me time. watched pulp fiction in the morning, then some chappelle lost episodes in the afternoon. iss lepppperrd!
other than that, i went for a city stroll over to dre's place at king/bathurst and we had a beer and some other. watched a bit-o-tv and played tekken.
here's my stoned theory: a game like tekken builds you up and leads you to believe that slowly you are climbing the ladder, you're outranking other people the more you fight (and win). somehow, it is assumed and obviously implied that the goal of the game is to achieve 'tekken lord' status- but! what if that's impossible? the programmers could very well have made it so hard it's unbeatable, once at that stage. but you keep playing... keep hoping...
it's some sort of AI going on whereby the 'computer' learns your moves, your typical reactions (dodge to the left right off the bat), etc. and, by the time you reach where my brother is stuck, now- it's like fighting against yourself and the computer combined.
i know, like... whoa. these were my thoughts while dre got his ass kicked by post apocalyptic feng™.
it arrived around 3:50PM yesterday and i promptly removed plastic and what seemed to be staples (to hold it on) that were applied by seizure john, the ol' staple gun slinger from the southwest (wing). fuck there were a lot.
so i pretty much sat around all day waiting, washed some dishes, really enjoyed the me time. watched pulp fiction in the morning, then some chappelle lost episodes in the afternoon. iss lepppperrd!
other than that, i went for a city stroll over to dre's place at king/bathurst and we had a beer and some other. watched a bit-o-tv and played tekken.
here's my stoned theory: a game like tekken builds you up and leads you to believe that slowly you are climbing the ladder, you're outranking other people the more you fight (and win). somehow, it is assumed and obviously implied that the goal of the game is to achieve 'tekken lord' status- but! what if that's impossible? the programmers could very well have made it so hard it's unbeatable, once at that stage. but you keep playing... keep hoping...
it's some sort of AI going on whereby the 'computer' learns your moves, your typical reactions (dodge to the left right off the bat), etc. and, by the time you reach where my brother is stuck, now- it's like fighting against yourself and the computer combined.
i know, like... whoa. these were my thoughts while dre got his ass kicked by post apocalyptic feng™.
as i sit here drinking my coffee, digesting my pancake, egg, and cheese concoction, and reminiscing on last night's complete and utter breakdown, it reminds me of how hindsight really is 20/20 and often sleeping on something makes it clearer. pulp fiction's on the tele and life is good once again. i feel like such an emotional child sometimes, though i guess we all are, duh. so i got pissed off 'cause i wanted someone to give me a pep talk, then i just gave it to myself and went to sleep.
in other news: the couch is coming today and i have the day off to receive it. leon's are useless- they said they would call the day-of to give an estimated time for delivery, so i was hoping it would be early and i could go into work for the afternoon. but, oh no, they called about 30 minutes ago to give me the why-bother estimate of "between 12 and 3pm". thank you, morons!
but by 5pm i'll have a couch, so it's not all bad.
now, if you excuse me, i have to go watch phil lamarr's head essplode.
in other news: the couch is coming today and i have the day off to receive it. leon's are useless- they said they would call the day-of to give an estimated time for delivery, so i was hoping it would be early and i could go into work for the afternoon. but, oh no, they called about 30 minutes ago to give me the why-bother estimate of "between 12 and 3pm". thank you, morons!
but by 5pm i'll have a couch, so it's not all bad.
now, if you excuse me, i have to go watch phil lamarr's head essplode.
well it hit tonight. doing my official budget looks like i'll be a fucking hermit for most of the time. now i feel like an adult, i guess, all depressed over money (and the lack thereof). regretting some of my past decisions, i.e. wasting $10k at university.
pissed off and alone. a great night.
how can i possibly sleep? i know i will adjust, but right now i'd like to curl up in a ball and pretend i'm in a coma.
motherfuck.
pissed off and alone. a great night.
how can i possibly sleep? i know i will adjust, but right now i'd like to curl up in a ball and pretend i'm in a coma.
motherfuck.
new room.
still unpacking/culling. need a couple new furniture things.
coming along...
i am at my parents' place up north, pretending. i worked approx. 12 hours today at a wedding and it was cool. learned some shit, and made some money. i am pretending, right now, that the past four years did not exist, this is because i have been drinking. if i acknowledge the past while, crying is imminent. pretending i don't want a mcdonald's fix, too.
the ability to sabotage my own relationships with people is astounding. a skill learned only so well with lots of practice. i am a pro.
in other news: chee'burgah!
the ability to sabotage my own relationships with people is astounding. a skill learned only so well with lots of practice. i am a pro.
in other news: chee'burgah!
guano.
ya, so...
i forgot that, while walking ever so briskly in the wrong direction, yesterday, i came across a dark patch on the sidewalk. kind of assumed gum or dead pigeons, but then i realised what was going on- bats. the whole ground underneath this tree was littered with droppings... that actually dropped... from above. black mannah from heaven.
anyway, it reminded me of our stop at carlsbad caverns and how the plaque said in the actual batcave (no tours through there, der) the bat sheiza is 40 feet deep. !!!
no wonder there are no tours, you'd need snowshoes. guanoshoes. unfortunately we were unable to stay for the ascent of the bats, which happens around 6PM. we had to get going and it was 4... so close. there's a special bat-watching amphitheatre and all! we did do the 2.5 mile walking self-guided tour because taking the elevator to the base then walking around is gay. the natural entrance is breathtaking, my photos don't do it justice. get thee hence!
i forgot that, while walking ever so briskly in the wrong direction, yesterday, i came across a dark patch on the sidewalk. kind of assumed gum or dead pigeons, but then i realised what was going on- bats. the whole ground underneath this tree was littered with droppings... that actually dropped... from above. black mannah from heaven.
anyway, it reminded me of our stop at carlsbad caverns and how the plaque said in the actual batcave (no tours through there, der) the bat sheiza is 40 feet deep. !!!
no wonder there are no tours, you'd need snowshoes. guanoshoes. unfortunately we were unable to stay for the ascent of the bats, which happens around 6PM. we had to get going and it was 4... so close. there's a special bat-watching amphitheatre and all! we did do the 2.5 mile walking self-guided tour because taking the elevator to the base then walking around is gay. the natural entrance is breathtaking, my photos don't do it justice. get thee hence!
though, come to think of it, bats don't reside anywhere at night. they flap around and shit (get it?) but they wouldn't hang out in a tree. scratch that.
i am not hungover anymore, but my stomach wants a cheeseburger. i am eating granola with hemp seeds and yogurt. this morning when i got up, i remembered the thawing chicken in the fridge and proceeded to cook it on my dollar store tray. oil bubblin' and fire alarm going off at 7AM- desperately fanning it with my towel since, stupidly, there is no ten-minute interruption button. duh.
last night was a combination of beer, raspberry beer, more beer... then some cheese with nachos sprinkled under them, then finishing beer, a sip of wine, and a tokey toke. raymi invited me to join her and phil at the victory cafe for dinner, and i was late because i drew a complete blank on where markham street lies, geographically.
in other news- it was fun! chillin', bullshittin', a whole lotta "...in'".
later raymi called me brown and said i eat weird food, to which i laughed and shoved more cheese in my cheese hole. phil said something about danishes being stuck to your head in reference to princess lea, and i dunno why it's still funny, but the literal image in my head is great. you should join me, sometime... my head is a great place to be.
except for right now 'cause i'm not-having-a-cheeseburger angry, and a wee bit moody from, you know, stuff...
ended up seeing her friend stefan at the foggy dew later on, which was some sort of freakish non-deja vu™ because we were talking about him earlier. what are the chances?! mystical.
hmmm. at the foggy dew my brother & roomie/best friend matt were waiting with friends since matty p's heading to banff for three months on an internship. it was a going away dealy that i caught five minutes of before going back to their place for the smokey smokey sir.
then home, crash, etc. wow, i am even boring myself with this post, time to stop. those $5 singapore noodles are calling my naaaaaaaaaaaaame. eep.
chillin' in my new digs.
more pics soon.
ha.
the past three visitors to my blog have been ME.
i am amused. it's okay, no really, it IS... if you don't start reading i ill emotionally capitalize MORE WORDS without warning!
you've been warned.
no, i kid, i don't care...
hmm.
the past three visitors to my blog have been ME.
i am amused. it's okay, no really, it IS... if you don't start reading i ill emotionally capitalize MORE WORDS without warning!
you've been warned.
no, i kid, i don't care...
hmm.
so lonely, talk to me.
http://www.a-i.com/show_tree.asp?id=115
haha. my conversation went as follows:
Alan: "Did you want to talk or should I propose a subject?"
Me: "Where's the beef?"
Alan: "The beef? It's behind the closet."
Me: "My closet has no 'behind'."
Alan: "I see."
Me: "Good, you are not blind."
Alan: "That is correct."
Me: "But you don't have eyes."
Alan: "Who needs eyes?"
Me: "Humans."
Alan: "Humans! Where would I be without them? Out of a job... out of a life!"
HAHA!
haha. my conversation went as follows:
Alan: "Did you want to talk or should I propose a subject?"
Me: "Where's the beef?"
Alan: "The beef? It's behind the closet."
Me: "My closet has no 'behind'."
Alan: "I see."
Me: "Good, you are not blind."
Alan: "That is correct."
Me: "But you don't have eyes."
Alan: "Who needs eyes?"
Me: "Humans."
Alan: "Humans! Where would I be without them? Out of a job... out of a life!"
HAHA!
dramatic chipmunk
gmail is certainly lagging in the "send" department. i don't think anyone's getting my emails. argh!!
arm's length hurts more than a hug.
"Life never ceases to amaze me." He told me this last night, and he's right. The past two weeks have been a whirlwind of thoughts, materials, and substances. Preparing for another wave.This past weekend I moved into my new place- both Lisa and me moved. Spent my very first night there last night, and it was serene. Like a five year storm of frustration and laziness is now passing and the clouds are parting, it's getting warm... skin is tingling.
Life is good. Even when life is fleeting it is good, and what the past two weeks have taught me is that no matter what you expect you will be surprised. Taken. Eyes wide open see beyond what is meant and unexpected collisions are beautiful.
Though some may think it, we never really know why things happen. There is no why for us, only for machines. We are so much more than why. We are much more than purpose. We are much less than minute but effect more than we'd hoped when divided against ourselves...
The most surprising thing of all, is that I've had this feeling before. My life thus far has been incredibly meaningful. I've had so many soul questioning experiences that, somehow, I feel like I'm hogging. I've randomly met people who immediately felt closer than home. Perhaps it is cumulative chance... but I'd like to think there's something mystical about it all. Some lesson to be learned or some new perspective to be gained by opening up your soul to someone you barely know. Life, my life, is uncontrollably beautiful. Sunshowers and dark chocolate.
The past two weeks testify.
there is no "why", stupid.
why feel so stretched between feelings? why not enjoy them all?
ch-ch-changessss.
have no fear devout readers, all two of you, i will return with actual things to say once my brain is not a mess of ten thousand thoughts, all trying to escape from one tiny hole. no, not that hole.
in other news: i'm moving tomorrow! i am so excited, for many things- you know, independence, no nagging about stupid fucking shit all the time, no accountability to anyone but me (and somewhat my roommate, of course). but hello, all i can seem to think about is the fact that i will be taking transit to and from work, and how that will make losing this bit-o extra weight so much easier. it sounds fickle, but when you have to bike an hour a day and lift weights just to maintain a still-pretty-flabby waistline you'll understand. goodbye suburban flab, i cast thee out amongst the demons and whores that comprise north york. maybe more like the mormons and snores, haha!
yeah. i'm pretty stoked at also being able to control exactly what's in the cupboards and fridge, and am glad about controlling most of my own life, it's about fucking time. HOOYAH DRILL MASTER.
in other news: i'm moving tomorrow! i am so excited, for many things- you know, independence, no nagging about stupid fucking shit all the time, no accountability to anyone but me (and somewhat my roommate, of course). but hello, all i can seem to think about is the fact that i will be taking transit to and from work, and how that will make losing this bit-o extra weight so much easier. it sounds fickle, but when you have to bike an hour a day and lift weights just to maintain a still-pretty-flabby waistline you'll understand. goodbye suburban flab, i cast thee out amongst the demons and whores that comprise north york. maybe more like the mormons and snores, haha!
yeah. i'm pretty stoked at also being able to control exactly what's in the cupboards and fridge, and am glad about controlling most of my own life, it's about fucking time. HOOYAH DRILL MASTER.
most boring post award goes tooooo- the hunchback of older dame.
I AM CRUSHING YOUR HEAD!
annnnnnnnnnnnd...
my new couch:
so, about two hours ago, i cried in front of my boss for the first time. lame. i hate that... but it just happened. one minute i was saying i wasn't feeling well, only got about an hour's worth of disturbed sleep last night - the next i am tearing up making ugly-crying-face at him. i covered my mouth and ran away, just like in the movies, and he said it was okay that i go home.
stressful times, my friends. tonight, i go drink.
right now, i go read. chillin' in my room with a book, warm summer breeze blowing in, it's just like a movie, or the movie's just like me.
stressful times, my friends. tonight, i go drink.
right now, i go read. chillin' in my room with a book, warm summer breeze blowing in, it's just like a movie, or the movie's just like me.
two important developments:
1. i have an interview next week to assist, part time, at a photo studio doing photoshoppy/contact sheet, etc. things. this will be in exchange for studio time, so that'll get me off my ass and i can start planning some projects (i am just assuming i will get the job because of my skiLLz).
2. my back is out and i am at work downing ibuprofen life a beached whale, which doesn't even make sense. pain. also hunched over and walking around like i am 80 and have degenerative discs... unfortunately it is just my patience that is degenerative.
motherFUCK.
2. my back is out and i am at work downing ibuprofen life a beached whale, which doesn't even make sense. pain. also hunched over and walking around like i am 80 and have degenerative discs... unfortunately it is just my patience that is degenerative.
motherFUCK.
go go gadget legs!
our local chapter of DFBC (dogs in favour of beef consumption).
"Ordinary life is pretty complex stuff."
i am currently listening to 'the love song' by k-os because it's sunday and i have recently found i love this song. old albums get dug out when you rent a car and have to use a CD player (how archaic) on your joyride to london last weekend... then find that you like a completely different set of songs from an album which was lost in the abyss of singles that is your iPod.
today is one of those days where normal, everyday activities seem strange and weird and even complex. who knew. we were driving to wal mart to purchase a microwave this afternoon, and all of a sudden driving seemed alien. everyone in their little vehicles driving to their little destinations and little something. the word little is amusing today, too. today is a lucid dream, and so forth into poetic infinity.
i cannot explain any of this so please don't ask me to, but i do know that i'm now going to crack that bottle of vidal. the pelee island stuff- je l'aime. it's sunday and i feel i deserve wine for making it through another week alive. these are my daily justifications and i love them more dearly than i do my dog.
i didn't even know who harvey pekar was until steven mentioned this quote, which rings true (as do most quotes, non?). and now, without further adieu... a harvey pekar original, single-quote production... all the way from the world wide web, one night only:
superman resurrected in a time when america is, perhaps, losing its faith.
so, apparently people will accept Jesus as their saviour if you dress him in blue spandex and call him Superman.
par example:
"You will travel far, my little Kal-El, but we will never leave you-even in the face of our deaths. You will make my strength your own. You will see my life through your eyes, as your life will be seen through mine. The son becomes the father. And the father, the son."
Jor-El or THE BIBLE? you decide.
this concludes blatantly obvious story time...
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